he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
