I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
