A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
