i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
It's shark week go big or go home
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
