Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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