yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
