She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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