Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
