Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
