I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
