white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
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