I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
