You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
