I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
oh god the rape fog is back!
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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