how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
