A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Randomize
