i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
This is classic penis vs brain.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
