I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
