dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
