I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
