My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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