The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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