mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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