..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
