She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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