This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
