I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
