brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
