And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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