Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize