So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
