If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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