We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
