my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
