foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
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