Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
