Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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