this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Randomize