Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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