Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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