im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
