My friends, they love my intelligence
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Randomize
