My brain says no but my pants say off.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
