thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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