Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize