No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
What changed your mind?
Being sober
We were destined to go to rehab together
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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