Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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