So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
