are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
