Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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